What Constitute a Home?

The plan of starting over at another country remained a mere idea until the actual Visa was delivered right at our doorstep.

I don't know what to feel. Although I do miss my mom, I will be leaving what has been my home for all my life. The extreme heat, air-polluting public vehicles and the flooding streets are a part of who I am. Although I do pride myself of adapting quickly to any situation, I never intentionally jump into the water unless on extremely unavoidable circumstances - and migrating is one of them.

While typing the list of the things that we will be bringing when we migrate, the thought of leaving home struck me and I felt great trepidation. Where will we live? What kind of people will I meet? Will I get a job? What’s with the cold weather? I guess these questions are silently residing on my mind, undetected, and nobody seems to know the answer.

What I do fear the most is being put in a place filled with strangers and peculiar surroundings. But I had a realization…well sort of like an unanswered question or an unfinished train of thought that may have temporarily quelled a big chunk of my panicking mind:

What constitutes a home?

Although the answer to this question is quite obvious to most people; realizing it and more importantly believing it is another story. And to some, who can compartmentalize logic and emotion, it presents quite a challenge.

Putting what I feel and/or what I am not feeling on a virtual paper helps calm my nerves but only for a couple of minutes. And for the next couple of days, I will experience all colors of emotions, a roller coaster ride filled with peaks of happiness and valleys of dread. By the time the ride ends, I know for a fact that I will be feeling much better, but vomiting isn’t quite an experience to cherish.